Archive for the ‘Likes and Dislikes’ Category

1 year and 9 months. That’s exactly how long I’ve abandoned this little cozy space.

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Photo by : Ko Thawng Thang

I don’t want to be a hypocrite

Say I wanted to criticize about a group of people in Burma regarding how they’d been doing business there. Then, I’d ask myself “What kind of very successful business do you have to validate that statement”? Snap! I deleted the draft. Or say I liked to blog about “how networking is not for very honest people who can’t pretend a bit” (because I personally dislike it). My inner self would ask me “Have you not pretended once among many strangers?”. And there goes another post into the bin.

Basically, I attempted to. But couldn’t conclude anything. My usual writer / blogger / whatever block.

I’m tired of Burma

As someone who have been spending almost all of her years in 20s abroad, I still feel as if I am one of most practical bridges to connect occurrences  and those who have no clue about Burma. And obviously Burma is major topic on this blog. But I tend to be sick of it.

I could have blogged about first ever chance to vote in my entire life, hype about election or some lamest things you couldn’t imagine elsewhere. But I am really tired of it.

I hate doing what everyone’s doing since I was little. I hate following the hype unless it draws immense attention to me. Likewise, when every ones’s rushing to talk about Burma, I feel bored.

I Spent Way Too Much Time on Facebook

You might say “You don’t say” or “It happens to everyone of us”. But then, I suppose I could use an excuse or two saying I need to keep track of what is actually happening on Facebook everyday because that’s basically part of how I am earning money right now.

I am not a privacy freak and I would not agree with those cartoons screaming “Social networks destroy our real social connections” and stuff like that. But still. It took quite a fair share of my time and I rarely wanted to write elsewhere.

Regardless,

I’m back. Both to this blog and soon to Yangon. I don’t know if I’m disappointed or excited at this point. I am slightly scared of reversed culture-shock, though. Many people forecasted that I wouldn’t be able to live in Yangon! So, we’ll see.

First of, I’m not a very devoted Buddhist anymore. I do not pray daily like I did till half a year ago. I still lie at times although I don’t kill/steal/drink/cheat with one’s spouse. If I have to come out with an excuse to conceal my laziness, it has to be my lack of commitment on studying more about it and meditating. Buddhism in Myanmar, to be precise, traditional Buddhism in Myanmar is too vague. Since a couple of years ago, I become to have a strong feeling that I must learn Buddhism via English resources. Many Myanmar might bash me for saying so but who are they to judge me?

Leave that aside, from time to time, I have been developing my tolerance and impression on other religions, or rather people who follow different religions. I have lots of Muslim friends – my first every best friend was a lovely Muslim girl, my first neighbour in my entire life was a very friendly Muslim family, one of my my first colleagues is a funny Muslim girl and I have been asked if I was a Muslim at times because of my facial appearance. Long story short, I do not have any problem with them just because they follow a different religion apart from a need of reminding myself not to talk about/eat pork when they are around. Same thing goes for Christians. In fact, I even feel like Christians in Myanmar are really lovely and fun to hang out as they have open mindset comparing to average Buddhists, a little bit more westernized in a way. And that is very cool with me. Needless to mention for Hinduism as my great great grandpa is a Hindu and even my parents still believe in some parts of Hinduism.

Being said, I do not really like the idea of discussing about religion with friends. What’s the point of doing so unless you are in an interfaith dialogue section? I feel it way more peaceful, fun and enjoyable whenever we do not discuss about it with people with various beliefs. For me, religion is something to practice yourself, not to show off to everyone around you as if you own a genuine diamond ring while theirs are intimate ones.

Here’s the point of those long winded intro. Very recently, a friend of mine chatted with me. She is my childhood friend whom I know since like 16 years ago. She is the one who had introduced me with Christian for first time ever when she had given away Christian leaflets in our primary class on her birthday as gifts to classmates. So, recently we were talking about childhood and all these stuff. She seems to love me so much even now and I love her, too. She is super adorable. Finally, she asked me what should she pray for me at church next time. I was like “Wow, she loves me that much?”. Then she concluded our conversation with “May God bless you.”

I kind of felt uneasy. To make it very clear, I am very thankful to have such a friend who would spend time for me during her religious session. And that made me think of all those “May God bless you” things. As there are very few religions in our world which are not based upon “God”, many people are very used to say “May God bless you” as if it was a greeting phrase. I am really thankful to be greeted so but I can’t help thinking if we actually need it? Of course, you should definitely do it with those whoever believe in God. But for other people who are atheists and who follow religions with different nature, would it even make sense? Yes, I know. Whoever saying “May God bless you” to me really care for me and want me to see fine with everything. I totally understand they say it with good will. But shouldn’t there be a better way to show our “love” with something  that is not related to religion? Wouldn’t it be a bit more comfortable?  Why do we need to bring “religion” to stress that we care our loved ones? Just my thoughts, you can differ freely. And I would still appreciate whoever would say this to me in future like I thank to whoever tell me to eat more vegetables although they know I have lachanophobia. (At this point, I consider literally like 15 times should I publish this or not as I do not want to lose friendship with any of my friends. I was kind of scared people would think me immature or intolerant. But I still want to do it so that you are reading it now. 🙂 ) 

And I still have no clue what should I reply apart from a boring “thanks” to “May God bless you” greeting. Should I reply something like

Impermanent are all created things, strive on with awareness.

My Phobias

I believe there’s no such a person without a single type of phobia. Everybody has at least one and so do I. But my phobias are pretty unique as the way I am.

1) Lachanophobia (Fear of Vegetables)

My worst phobia ever. Since I was born, I have very rarely eaten it. It was worse in childhood. When I was in primary school, I seldom had my dinner with my family. The reason was I couldn’t stand the smell of any type of vegetables. Whenever my mom was reheating the vegetable dishes, I ran away from kitchen.

So, what happen if I try to eat it. Vomitting!! I really have tried to consume these green thingies but it always ends with vomitting. It literally drives me to run to the basin and vomit all from my stomach.

Treatment? No one and nothing can attract me to conquer it. My dad has tried to make me eat vegetables by giving me double of normal pocket money when I was about 11. I have been scolded and beaten by my mom. But nothing works till now. The only thing my boyfriend can do is removing such thing from my meal in case we forget to put additional note when we make our order.

Exception? Yes, there are some under the group of vegetables that I can consume. These things include corn, all kind of peas and beans, potatoes, sweet potatoes and the only leave I eat (& I like!) is tea leave, in fact, pickled tea leave. I can eat spring rolls though it is made up of varieties of vegetables. Plus, all fruits are fine with me though some people who have Lachanophobia also encounter fear of fruits, too.

I know there are tons of cons because of this phobia such as dining with unfamiliar people, making others shock when I reveal this, getting assumed that I have some abnormal emotions and you name it. But it just can’t help. :\

2) Anthophobia (Fear of flowers)

I’m neither tomboy nor a boyish girl, but I can’t stand for flowers, too. It may be related to Lachannophobia and my assumption is I’m always afraid of green things but I love the colour green! I hate seeing flowers even as an image. My face will be too ugly whenever I get the smell of any type of flowers. It happens even now, just by imaging the smell! But I’m totally fine with plastic or paper flowers.

As I’m a buddhist and almost all of buddhists especially in Myanmar have worshiped Buddha with flowers and they usually put and clean the vases,  some people have asked me about this.

How would you do this when you have family?

And my simple answer is “My boyfriend will do so”. :D.

3) Xanthophobia (Fear of Yellow colour)

No, I’m not mentally ill person.And this phobia is a softer one. It should be said as a “strong dislike” rather than “fear” to translate phobia in this case.

I never use yellow even when I’m just aimlessly playing with paper or paints. I don’t have any yellow coloured clothing nor any stuffs. And I am not happy to see someone wearing yellow outfits especially if he/she is my favourite.

4)Tonitrophobia (Fear of Thunders)

I don’t recall if I had during my childhood.But though I’m an absolute adult, I don’t feel comfortable when it’s thundering. 😦

I can sleep if it’s raining cats and dogs at midnight. But I can’t stay near windows if it’s thundering. If I were walking on the road when it’s thundering, I feel like sweating a lot and walk at my best speed to reach under a safe roof.

5) Thanatophobia (Fear of Death or Dying)

It simply sucks. I am tolerant to pain and not afraid of diseases nor suffering but dying. Because I don’t really have no idea what will happen to me after death. I’m a Buddhist and strongly believe about sansara but wondering what will exactly happen to ME.

Another feeling is why all things in my life need to be gone after death? All things I’ve created, got, loved, felt will be gone! That’s why I can’t imagine what if I die. To solve this phobia, I guess I need to meditate regularly.

6)Scriptophobia (Fear of Writing in public)

Yeah, I love writing from bottom of my heart but not in front of everyone. 😦 I can’t continue writing if someone is looking at the screen. It implied not only to writing stories/poems but also to writing codes and I could manage to overcome the latter.

I know why it happens. The reason is I’m too shy to show it out before it’s completely finished. Once it’s done, I’m more than ready to show it to everyone I’d love to.

Well, it’s enough. That’s all for me (at least, almost all). My dad has serious Hemophobia, my mom has Ophidiophobia, Chinese are well-known for having Tetraphobia, some Myanmar do have Sinophobia and Aquaphobia & Acrophobia are also widely found in most people.

So, let me know what’s yours? Can’t think of one? Find it out here or here.